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Wednesday 16 February 2011

As promised

.

(albeit, a day late)
Remember this post about having a big secret?

Here is my big secret...

I DID NOT FINISH SCHOOL. So who cares right!? Lots of people didn't finish college or university right! I am like a lot of people!!!! Ok well let me start again:

I DID NOT FINISH HIGH SCHOOL. Yeah that got ya by surprise didn't it. You're horrified and shocked, right? Well I have told only a small number of people what this secret was. I had one guys jaw literally drop and his eyes got huge, in manner I've not seen in a while. Kinda like this:


Yeah, nice reaction buddy! I know he's gonna read this and swear he was cool with it, and maybe he is now but in the moment it was pure monkey shock and awe!

I mentioned it over coffee to a couple of close friends. One didn't have much to say, but I know that it was a surprise, and I also know she'll still love me anyway. The other one actually had guessed that that was my secret and since I trust her I felt confident that it wouldn't be a problem. After all my truest of friends won't care that I am not University educated in the art of friendship.

Getting past that, now what? Well I was faced with a few options.
1.) Do nothing and keep hiding my shame, go through life as I always have (suffering with a case of the "dumbs")
2.) Get my GED and be done with it. After all I get one of these that says I'm equal to a graduate
3.) Tackle the embarassment head on and GO BACK TO HIGH SCHOOL. What the f*ck? Did I just say that? Yup. It's an option right?

So what do you think I did? I chose option #3, yup the hard option. The one that will have me finish high school properly. I'll even get a cap & gown ceremony at a real high school (my son's high school actually.. can you say AWE-SOME! I can but her likely won't. Wonder how he'll feel when I tell him I'm deferring receipt of my diploma to 2015 so we can formally graduate on the SAME day!!) Yup I am the parent of the year, folks, did you ever doubt it? OK well you should have because after googling for an image of what that certificate would look like I learned that there isn't one. Ha! Jokes on me. I guess I thought it was real, because... well... I'm dumb. I have already proven that in my admission to bein a high school drop out. Are you following me still?

All joking aside. I am going back to school. I am doing it for me. I am proud of my decision. I hope my son will be proud of me too, and the secret shame he feels of having a drop out for a mom will be gone soon.

So now you know!! It's all out there! Now I need to enjoy my last few days of being a lady of leisure. Because next week, this chicka is rolling back the clocks and redoing 1994! School starts on Monday!
Wish me luck good grades!





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NOTE: The feelings expessed in this post reflect soley the views I feel towards MYSELF for not finishing school and how that impacted my career goals. This does not mean I feel that others in the same situation are losers or that they have less worth than those who finished.

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6 comments:

  1. Anonymous3:34 pm

    well color me surprised! I really thought you went to college.

    ReplyDelete
  2. tchildsavon3:48 pm

    Good for you Coleen! What a huge decision you've made! I wish you all the luck, but as for good grades, I don't think you'll need any help! You ROCK lady!! (Theresa C)

    ReplyDelete
  3. #3 is the easiest! I had my first son when I was 17 and afterward, I went to night high school and completed 2 1/2 years worth of school in 6 months, complete with cap and gown ceremony. You can do it! Nothing to be embarrassed about either, I say!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Way to go!
    But...level of education has nothing to do with intelligence.
    Zip.
    Squat.
    It has to do with life circumstances, but definitely not brain power. You're obviously a smart, creative woman and I'm really glad that you're doing something you want to do for yourself.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I totally resent the idea that not graduating is something that makes you a loser.
    There are a lot of reasons that people don't graduate highschool... And it's okay to feel like you're not good enough for yourself having not graduated...
    But I didn't graduate and I'm perfectly fine. I'm no loser. I'm not stupid. I'm not failing, and I am ABSOLUTELY not ashamed.
    So know that you really don't HAVE to graduate to get over it. You can be anything you want, and most things don't require that you have a grade twelve if you're willing to work hard enough.
    :)

    Great post, though. Good for you for being brave enough to share something that obviously weighs on you.
    don't let your formal education dictate how you view yourself. there are so many other things to be judged by!!!

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for a taking a moment to let me know your thoughts! I love comments!

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